A True Tale: “The Saga of Tom Turkey” by Kenosha Marge

(Editor’s Note:When this post was first published in November 2008 it became an instant classic…So, we’re making it a new tradition here at IA. Original comments follow:

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All of us here at IA would like to extend to all our visitors our best wishes for a wonderful Thanksgiving Day. We hope any political differences that may be within your families will be put aside to so that everyone can reflect on the good things that life brings our way.

Before Kenosha Marge begins her entertaining true story about a particular turkey that entered her life, I want to offer a little aside about the wild turkeys I saw while living in New Jersey.  Unbelievably, I saw two birds in “full feather” emerge from a small wooded area in back of the office in Hamilton, NJ (suburban Trenton) one day as I was standing at the copy machine, gazing out the window. Needless to say, I was totally shocked, considering that the office was in the middle of a very busy area, not in the “wilds of NJ.”  The two birds were magnificent and gave me the thrill of a lifetime!

So, on to Kenosha Marge’s wonderful story…and best wishes for your Thanksgiving Day from Marge, Grail Guardian, American Lassie, Leslie, and me!  And, we give our thanks to all of you for visiting our site. ~~InsigntAnalytical-GRL)

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The Saga of Tom Turkey (A Bird with Attitude)

~~By Kenosha Marge

Our family has a Thanksgiving story that is trotted out ever year. With a golden brown carcass of a roasted turkey having pride of place on the dinner table we tell the tale of another turkey. We speak of a turkey that never graced anyone’s dinner table.

The story starts innocently enough. The spouse decided one spring that what we needed most in life was to raise our own turkeys. Having learned nothing from the debacle of the raising of our own chickens he insisted that we had no idea of the taste delight of homegrown turkey. He had said the same thing about the chickens but only he and our eldest son and the occasional guest could attest to that fact since the rest of us were unable to eat a chicken we knew.

Sarah, the Mooseburger Mom

~~By kenosha Marge

Our dear friends in my ex party simply cannot help themselves. Try as they might they cannot pretend to be anything but derisive about people that are not like them. Coddled in their own little world they strike out at the very people they pretend to care about. People that struggle on a daily basis to pay the bills and work towards a better life for their children. These are the people that my erstwhile party pretends to care about. And women. While calling us trailer trash and rednecks. How special.

Pardon me if I say baloney. Or don’t pardon me. I really don’t care. I don’t care because the blindfold is no longer on and I see that the party that claimed to be all about women’s rights and human rights and caring about the poor and the afflicted is lead by mountebanks. I am disgusted with myself for not seeing this before now. I am disgusted with myself for voting a straight Democratic ticket for over 40 years. I am disgusted that I believed that they would fight for women’s rights.

The light of truth began to shine through my Democratic Blindfold during the primaries when most of the media, the Democratic Party and the DNC slobbered relentlessly over Obama and derided, insulted, and dismissed Senator Clinton. I had expected the Clinton-hating media to attack Senator Clinton. I had expected the GOP to get their jollies by having a Clinton to kick around once again. But attacked by her party? Mind-boggling! Had I not all ready seen the error of my ways in believing that my erstwhile party was the party that most respected women along came Governor Sarah Palin the Mooseburger Mom and the excrement hit the fan. The Democratic Party proved that it is not only a party that does not respect women, they proved themselves a party that denigrates, derides, lies, and hyperventilates over the very idea that a woman would dare to run for Vice President of the United States. No sooner had they disabused their womenfolk of the notion than the damn Republicans had the audacity to put a female on their ticket. This, screeched the left, will never do.

The sight of so many prominent Democrats, male and female rushing to attack Governor Palin is repulsive. Men and women I had once admired hastened to cast the first stone at this woman from nowhere. They revealed themselves and it wasn’t a pretty sight.

Democrats and media have thrown everything they could think of against this woman and still, at least for now, she’s the most popular of the 4 candidates. She even edges out Obama by a point. Oh the humanity!
What is there about her that drives reasonable people to lose all perspective?

Why the hate for Sarah Palin?

First and foremost there is the resurgence of Republican enthusiasm. Holy cow are they enthused! Just when Dems were doing victory laps because the Republican voters were moribund, along came Sarah.

Many Dems were sure that large numbers of Conservative voters would stay home. Most of the Pundidiots were predicting an Obama blowout. John McCain was once again declared dead. Oh what a difference an unknown female Governor from Alaska makes. Large numbers of voters now seem to be very robust Sarah Palin fans. Will that mean more votes for McCain? You betcha! Therein lies the tale of the loathing and hysteria.

Second, and this is admittedly just my opinion, I think the left fears the ordinariness of Sarah Palin. Not her good looks, although that doesn’t hurt. Not her intellect, which they try to deride by claiming she’s a female Dan Quayle. No it’s the ordinary life she, her husband and children live in spiteof the fact that she is a governor. A film clip I saw on Greta Van Susteren showed the Palin family around the kitchen table and there was a mayonnaise jar with a knife still sticking out of it. I remember seeing that many, many times in my own kitchen. Ordinary. Homey.

Sarah Palin is also, gasp, a hunter. Or is that huntress? In all events she takes a gun, goes out, kills a moose, field dresses it and said moose ends up in her freezer and ultimately on the dinner table. Oh the horror of it all.  She eats meat; meat that she killed! Oh yuck. Whereas the rest of the carnivorous people in the world eat meat that, what, died of old age? Those steaks on your plate were killed amongst the most horrendous circumstances you can imagine. Animals die in pain, fear and filth. Hunted animals die, usually, in their own environment quickly and with a minimum of fear and pain. But in the end, they are all just as dead.

Millions of Americans are hunters. Deriding Governor Palin for being a hunter is silly and stupid. FYI, I am not a hunter and the thought of killing animals and eating their flesh finally became so repulsive to me that I because a vegetarian a few years ago. See http://www.goveg.com/slaughterhouse.asp

We’ll all just have to wait and see what comes next. A day off of politicking for 9/11 may have given some people a chance to step back, take a deep breath and get over their hysteria. The Shrillosphere did not because it is not in their nature. And besides, Governor Sarah Palin is a woman. And we know how they love to hate women.

All in all this has been a most enlightening election cycle for me. I’ve learned about Fauxgressives and phony liberals and misogynistic Democrats and horrendously sexist media. I’ve learned that for some feminism isn’t really about women. Feminism is only for the “right” kind of women. Liberal women.

Who knew?

I’m still in the process of learning about Sarah The Mooseburger Mom. If nothing else, it should be entertaining.