Martinis with Michelle–A Times (UK) Writer Jumps the Shark as Palin Helps Block a Senate Super-Majority

~~By InsightAnalytical-GRL

A couple of days ago I happened to spot the post over at PUMA P.A.C. entitled “Worth Repeating” which offers an encore presentation of an odious ode to Hillary “Nutcracker” Clinton.  Fast forward to mid-November and CNN’s obsession with the fashion f*ckups of First ladies  and how Michelle Obama is supposed to be our hope for a First Lady who really knows how to do it RIGHT.

Little did I know that there was something lurking in the archives of The Times (UK) that I had somehow missed in the first days following the election. It was published on November 5th, beating CNN to the punch–of course, I wasn’t thinking correctly in the aftermath of the depressing election and was not really looking for things to make me want to feel even sicker.  And this DOES make me want to vomit as reality has set in and the crap is so completely over-the-top that it makes Lewis Black seem discrete…

November 5, 2008

Michelle Obama: a new type of First Lady

Sarah Vine

That rather sad, muffled noise you hear behind the whoops and cheers of Democrat America is not the sound of defeated neocons mourning the passing of trickle-down economics; it is the sound of sobbing in the Élysée Palace. For Carla Bruni, reigning queen of First Ladies, the game is finally up. Cindy McCain would have been a push-over; even Sarah Palin she could have coped with, sexy specs or otherwise. But in Michelle Obama, Ms Bruni has truly met her match. This is a First Lady like none before.

In truth, from the moment Michelle Obama stepped on to that podium at the Democrat convention what seems like, ooh, about three million years ago, we all secretly knew which way this race was going. Sure, he had big, sticky-out ears; sure, all those luvvies made that embarrassing YouTube song about him; but if Michelle thought that he was OK — if she chose him — then he just had to be a good man.

Everything about this woman speaks to the modern, post-feminist woman: she is manifestly clever, independently minded, attractive in a normal, accessible way (and not in a scary, plastic-fantastic Cindy way). Her demeanour is a reassuring mixture of sassy and self-deprecating; her easy, confident dress sense neither too sexy nor too self-conscious. Most of all, however, she appears to be the personification of sanity, a woman who, while clearly supportive of her husband’s quest for world domination, is nevertheless not afraid to point out when he is danger of drinking too much of his own Kool-Aid.

(SNIP a brief discussion of two types of First Ladies, with Jackie Kennedy being the only style-queen among the bunch)

What makes Michelle unique is the way she so skilfully unites all three: supportive, independent and a fashion icon. Sarah Palin blew £90,000 on her campaign wardrobe but let’s face it, it is that blue shift dress that we all remember.

In the last American election, the big question was this: who would you most want to share a beer with? In this one, it was more like: who would you like to share a Martini with? The answer of course being Michelle. (Barack could maybe make himself useful by popping out for some crisps.) Michelle is not only invigoratingly intelligent, proud of her urbanity, but also unafraid of showing her abilities. She is certainly the only wife of a presidential candidate I can remember who, instead of playing herself down, played up the general uselessness of her husband in matters domestic — and in doing so not only held her ground intellectually but also reached out to all those women who, while devoted to their spouses, also find them slightly useless in matters of sock-tidying.

Perhaps the most exciting thing about Michelle however is what having a woman lawyer like her in the White House means. For it is not often one can go to sleep safe in the knowledge that there is an educated, intelligent, sensible female voice being heard in the corridors of power.

At the 2004 Democrat Convention in Boston, when the unknown Barack Obama stepped up to the plate to deliver the keynote speech, she famously said to him: “Don’t screw it up, buddy.” One cannot help hoping those words were repeated last night.

Well. The writer fell for the Sarah Palin clothes smear and doesn’t seem to remember that Hillary Clinton is a lawyer who lived in the White House. She trashes Cindy McCain and weeps for Carla Bruni.  And I don’t remember that blue shift dress at all, but I sure do recall the “black widow” number from election night.  As for wanting to share a Martini with Michelle…frankly, I don’t drink, but I may start any minute to help numb myself from 4/8 more years of this spew!

So who the hell IS Sarah Vine, anyway? Well, according to her publisher, Penguin Books, she

was born in Wales and raised in Italy. As a child she had a great capacity for reading comics, gossiping and trying on her mother’s shoes, all of which have stood her in excellent stead. She writes for the Times and is married with two children.

Stellar credentials, I guess for this sort of nonsense. She must have a least one daughter, because she’s created a website based on her co-authored book, “The Great Big Glorious Book for Girls.”  There’s a certain Victorian quaintness to this tome.  And is Vine confused as she refers to Michelle Obama as the epitome of the “modern, post-feminist woman”?  I don’t know, it’s seems real weird to me, a pre-post modern feminist.

Let me give you an example from the book. The site includes activity sheets for things like “making pom poms” and “palm reading,” to name a few.

But tucked away in the preview page for “The Great Outdoors” are instructions for falling out of a tree.  But before you get to that information, a girl will have to wade through this:

Learn to walk before you run; learn to fall before you climb. Knowing how
to fall properly is an art. Done well it is exciting, it looks great, can be very
funny – and besides, crutches are such a bore.

Start by perfecting the stage faint, itself an invaluable accomplishment and a
useful exit strategy for all manner of uncomfortable situations (non-completion
of maths homework, getting out of PE, wanting the morning off school). Practise
it on a lawn or in a room with a thick carpet.

Bend your ankles, bend your knees and let yourself go floppy, collapsing
vertically at first, until you start to topple. The trick is to be very loose, very
relaxed, and not to stick out a hand or try to catch yourself; you are supposed to
be unconscious. The aim is to hit the ground from the ground up, so that the bits
nearest the floor land first, softening the impact. A crumple is really what you’re
looking for – first your calf, then your thigh, then your waist, then your shoulder.
For added drama, and to dissipate the impact, you may wish to add a half roll.
Land with your eyes shut (or if you’re feeling really confident, rolled back in
your head). Resist the temptation to open one eye to check the reaction.

I have no words…

Meanwhile, in the much-despised real world of Sarah Palin, the “polarizing bimbo” created by the media, we find that she was down in Georgia on Monday drawing large crowds as she campaigned for Saxby Chambliss in the Georgia Senate run-off election (which Chambliss has won and which blocks a Democratic “super-majority). Apparently, there are some GOP operatives who don’t see her as the “kiss of death” politically and it seems a lot of real people didn’t see it that way either:

Several Republicans have campaigned for Chambliss, including one-time presidential candidates Rudy Giuliani, Mike Huckabee and Mitt Romney. McCain campaigned in the state last month, but only Palin was tapped for election eve and four Georgia stops, reflecting her star status. Tommy Byler, 22, of Savannah marveled at the size of the crowd Palin drew compared to other top-tier Republicans who have campaigned for Chambliss.

“I went to see Mitt Romney a week ago, and I think there were only about 100 people there,” said Byler, who wore a T-shirt emblazoned with Palin’s face and the words “Sarah Palin Is My Homegirl.”

So, while Michelle Obama practices being “supportive, independent, and a fashion icon,” Sarah keeps soldiering on.  Ah, but can Palin do a stage faint???

39 Responses

  1. What happened? I went to bed and it was 2008, and now it’s apparently 1958 again!

    I’m not going to rip Michelle Obama here (much as I disagree with her politics), but like you GRL I’m going after the Male Stream Media.

    WTF????? Screw what America things of the guy, Michelle thinks he’s good and that’s supposed to be enough for us “girls”?? Next we’re going to be talking about how when the Royal Couple Obamas pass gas that it smells like gardenias, and maybe we should invent an air freshener in that scent!

    I have to stop now or I’m gonna hurl on my keyboard.

    We are our own worst enemy.

  2. Anyone who thinks that Carla Bruni or Cindy McCain have anything to fear from Michelle Obama in the fashion department has obviously fallen into the Kool Aid vat and can’t get out. Lol!!! For anyone who hasn’t seen it, just go to Pumapac and take a look at Michelle in a horrid floral number complete with a matching couch!!!

  3. It is 9:17am is it too early for me to start drinking?? That article is incredible. Thanks, kinda, for drawing it to our attention.

  4. I had to stop reading that twits article when I read she felt MEchelle’s demeanor was self deprecating! You’ve got to be f@@King kidding me. I did want to vomit. Thanks for the warning before the article.
    I really am speechless that some people feel that way about her. All I see is an angry woman- that feels entitled. That is not pretty and not first lady quality in my opinion. But I guess I’m in the minority- doesn’t mean I’m wrong though.

  5. What time capsule has this ignorant twit been living in for the last 50 years?

    And Grail your “Male Stream Media” is too perfect! I intend to once again steal from you. This one has to be shared and repeated and repeated and repeated.

    Also probably needs to be explained to females like the twit who write the drivel Grl posted above. They probably think/believe that because a few females are scattered here and there in the media busily kowtowing to the patriarchy that this is a sign of gender equality.

  6. Speaking of twits, I meant to write “wrote” the the drivel Grl posted above not “write”.

  7. Earlier on I mistakenly directed you guys to the wrong site to see Michelle’s dress-that-goes-with-the couch. It’s at Hillbuzz, Dec. 1. Apologies! I cruise many of the PUMA sites everyday; got this one wrong. But check it out. It’s a sight to behold.

  8. Joanie..I found the link at Hillbuzz….really, a lot flashier than Laura Bush’s drapes!!!!!

    Grail—‘Male Stream Media’-do I sense a piece brewing in your brain???? I know Marge has her eyes on it!!! PUMA FIGHT!!!!! LOL!!!

    By the way, I’m reading that the MEchelle ring story is bogus…Obama camp denies it, but the Daily Mail….well, you know, why shouldn’t I believe them over the Obama crowd????? LOL!!!!

  9. Male Stream Media? Grail, you rock!
    Fantastic entry, GRL! Loved the background on this featherhead – trying on their mothers’ shoes seems to work better for boys apparently.
    Of course Michelle is their favorite, she was always a martini in, unwashed masses out gal – unlike the common Clintons
    Also, isn’t Time UK a Murdoch publication?

  10. oops! I landed in moderation for some reason.

  11. Edge..I’m still not exactly sure how moderation works…supposedly, those who have been approved don’t have to be approved again… but I don’t think that is working, so I have to approve everything…
    HOWEVER, I’ve noticed that sometimes posts with URLs in them go to moderation, while others from the same person don’t…This happens to me sometimes on other WP blogs as well…

  12. Since words cannot express my true feelings about this article, let me just say: ^%^$#@@@ (*&^^%$%$^^!!!!!!!!!!!

    I think this just about covers it!

  13. please! This woman should be forced to go back in time and live in corsets with no choices other than learning “proper young lady activities” so she can see how stupid her”article”really is and why we have conciencely moved away from such sexist crap.

    Lessons in falling! Hmmph! She might need lessonsin failing completely as a writer and as a woman!


  14. When I first read about the “fashion sense and style” of MO, I instantly remembered that flowery chintz number she wore at one of the “debates”. She looked like she had rifled through my Polish grandmother’s old-and-used-curtain box for the fabric. (seeing it with the couch on hillbuzz was hi-larious). But then I thought about that “kiss of the spiderwoman” beauty she modeled on (s)election night and really (as GG so gracefully put it) started to hurl. BTW, I do not remember any “blue shift dress”, and I have a pretty good memory for clothes…(e.g., I remember what I saw MO wearing at the Trumpet Awards Dinner as she dissed white women everywhere)
    As for finally having a woman lawyer in the White House…..

    Can somebody PLEASE tell me the flavor of that kool-aid ??? It must be something special.

    GG ~ “Male Stream Media” . . . How true is that?

  15. GRL – there are some things that automatically get you in moderation – such as posting links. Happened to your posts at my blog too.

  16. Glad you liked the Male Stream Media guys, but I can’t take credit for it. I stole it shamelessly from somewhere quite some time ago – not 100% sure but I think it was Uppity Woman, and I must give her the props.

  17. Everything about this woman speaks to the modern, post-feminist woman: she is manifestly clever, independently minded, attractive in a normal,…

    Michelle is the person who was telling women to NOT go to work in the corporate world. Yes, lets give women less pwoer in the world.

    Goes to show how her husband and her are corporate shills.

  18. CQ,

    Don’t think the loser needs any lessons in failing as either a writer or a woman. She seems to have mastered it!

  19. man, I hate it when I make a typo..pwoer = power.

  20. Sorry to intrude….looking for KenoshaMarge…..please contact…..the group is asking for you!!

    Also searching for other Traveling Pantsuit members we have lost track of.

    Thank you and you do have a great site!!

  21. Carla Bruni is not weeping. That sound the author hears in her head is laughter. The idea that either Bruni or Cindy McCain take a backseat to Michelle Obama when it comes to being fashionable is laughable. The part about her intellingence while overlooking Hillary being a lawyer and whatnot is too stupid for words.

    What this really points out to me though, is the mostly Male Stream Media’s (lol) incessant and pathological need to irrationally mythologize the Obamas. To hear them tell it, Barack is supposedly a combination of Lincoln/FDR/JFK/MLK Jr while Michelle is a Jackie O/Beyonce combo with an Ivy League education and law degree. Neither myths are even remotely true but, I guess that’s what we’re supposed to believe.

  22. Ladies and Gentlemen,

    Ms. Sarah Vine is exactly what’s wrong with feminism today. Hypocrites. Pure and simple.

  23. Michelle Obama has said she will pattern herself after Laura Bush. If that is the best example she can find, after the many independent, strong and hardworking DEMOCRATIC First Ladies she could have emulated, that shows how low she sets the bar for herself and us.

    By the way – Carla Bruni and Cindy McCain have talent, brains, and style. Moreover, Cindy has actually accomplished something. Me-chelle isn’t fit to be put in the same sentence as Cindy.

  24. The irony is that Cindy McCain is called “plastic” but Obama is “patterning” herself after Laura Bush!~ Wow, that’s very REAL, isn’t it??

    So, who is Obama and who is Michelle Obama? Gosh, another TWOFER!!!!!!

  25. And what will Sarah Vine follow up her book with? The Great Big Glorious Book for Teenagers? She can explain the bikini waxing protocol for teen girls on the cheerleading squad, and how to take those cool light-and-shadow semi-nude pics of yourself for you mySpace page.

  26. The ever sexist “Male Stream Media” hates Cindy McCain because she not only would grace the White House with style and beauty she could also fly Air Force One if needed. She is a talented woman who has quietly, on her own done good and useful things.

    Martini Michelle, or the Laura Bush Clone wannabe cannot hold a candle to Cindy. Cindy may look like a Barbie doll but that’s one talented and tough women under them fancy duds and that blond hair.

  27. Guess she had forgotten about Michelle’s camel toe moment (wearing waaaay tooo tight pants in front of the national spotlight no less)!

    Anyway, GRL…

    did you research Obama’s tic yet? I looked up them in the Louise Hay book and it signifies — extreme fear, feeling that everyone is watching you, R eye would mean about the future.

    wholly crap or what? talk about an easy “tell” when negotiating/bluffing

    They are gonna have to shoot him up with loads of Botox when he meets with Medvev and Putin.

  28. just had to share the response I got from Sen. Kohl urging him to compel OObama to show his vault birth certificate.

    ear Ms. :

    Thank you for contacting me. I appreciate hearing from
    you and welcome this opportunity to respond.

    As you may know, Hawaii became a state on August 21st,
    1959. President-elect Barack Obama was born in Hawaii in 1961,
    making him a United States citizen at birth under the first section
    of the 14th Amendment to the Constitution. President-elect
    Obama’s birth certificate has been made public, and is widely
    available online. This document has been authenticated by a
    variety of sources, including the Hawaii Department of Health and
    the Annenberg Public Policy Center.

    I hope this information proves useful to you. If I can be of
    assistance to you in any other matters, please do not hesitate to
    contact me.


    Kohl actually cites the ANNENBERG POLICY CENTER as evidence

  29. Can’t you see Meanchelle during a Christmas program in the White House next year? If she decorates the way she dresses…I am sure the trees will be lovely. But wait….didn’t I hear that they don’t celebrate Christmas or birthdays?

  30. FFO,

    Sounds like it’s time to “dis-elect” the “good” Senator…

  31. OMFreakinGod! Somebody, anybody, Insight!!! Shoot me now before I realize that I am going to have to be looking at that grinning hyena/sasquatch with dead fish cold eyes for the next four years…

    AAAARRRRRGGHHHHHHH (Stripes On Fire!!!)

    Michelle wants to be us when she grows up or she wouldn’t be the way she is now. Sorry ladies, I have been holding my feminist tongue for 2 years now….gotta let it out. Michelle is a DISGRACE! Her conniving, calculating ways give all of us a bad, bad, name.

  32. But Diamond, how do you really feel about her? lol

    The way I figure it, if the Supremes don’t stop the coronation at least I’ll save a butt load of money every month by cutting out my cable!

  33. Grail – THAT is not how I really feel about her – just the very tip of the iceberg, but I have kept it to myself because I always felt that no matter how much you dislike another woman – we have to break the cycle of bashing each other every time we don’t like something. Woman sticking together – but this chicka takes the proverabial cake!

    AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH (running around screaming still!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My Ear Tips Are On Fire!!)

  34. MEchelle has a sense of style??? Really??? Geeze, I haven’t seen any evidence of it, especially if that red and black horror of a dress she wore on election night is any indication.

    I still cannot believe that she and baracktrack will be moving into the WH. She is just, well… vile. Every time I think of her representing my beautiful country I just wanna puke.

  35. LMAO at the flowered chinz dress. My grammy made me a dress out of that same feedsack print back in the Fifties. I was five and had enough taste to refuse to wear it.

    I think the blue dress that is mentioned is the aqua-ish number Michelle wore on the first night of the convention. It was a lovely dress, probably the most flattering thing that I’ve seen her wear. Unfortunately, her bra strap was showing all through her speech.

    Vine’s article is hideous as is Michelle Obama’s attitude. When she told poor women to be content with low-paying service jobs, I wanted to spit on her. this idolatry of both Obamas is just sick.

    Btw, the so-called rhodium/diamond ring that is pictured is a bracelet.

  36. JeanLouise ~
    I knew it was a bracelet! It ought to be a choker for the lovely ME-chelle. I hear rhodium chokers are all the rage……………

  37. Mrs. obama has no innate sense of style. Ah hell the dame has bad taste — she defines bad taste. I’ve yet to see her wear an outfit that isn’t bad taste.

    Well sure she is post-feminist — because she sure as hell has never been a feminist. She is the definition of women are women’s worst enemies.

    Also she is r@cist — and I wouldn’t want her around my kids (if I had rug rats) — as a child I had to endure two black teachers who hate white kids — at the time I had no idea that there was a word for what these teachers were. Kids know when adults hate them for the color of their skin. Mrs. Obama seems to be seething with rage — it is just under the surface. Both Mr. & Mrs. Obama have had cosmetic surgery — according to assorted MDs who do that type of work. What a strange world we live in — candidates can be manufactured just like the Miss American contestants — a little cosmetic surgery, voice lessons, and “lady” lessons??

    Heaven help America.

  38. JeanLouise,

    I give you credit that you could watch her speech. Just.can’t.tolerate.MEchelle.or.Barack.

  39. NWR,

    Mrs. Obama seems to be seething with rage — it is just under the surface.

    Seems pretty out in the open to me! There is not one single angrier person I can think of than Michelle Obama.

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